sometimes

Sometimes I miss that trusting, just being, not thinking of anything bad, and the further away it gets and the shorted times of achieving it I wonder if it was just naivety or something...better?

Summer night

One day you're going to feel the wind blowing from the sea on that mountain, and the lights won't be changing.
One day you'll be just being. No more of this searching and seeking and wondering and waiting.
Be there in the fountains, be there in the morning, simply breathing, just being.

Culpable

I've realised, am realising, many things that I did 'wrong'. Do you ever see those too? Not as a sadness, but an internal opening that leaves you sad but happy; relieved.

partnerships

When they cannot see inside your world how can they understand or share it?

mirror

I know that I expect too much I know it's like I want me in another; I am craving that recognition only I can give myself, seeking it like a bloodhound looking for...whatever they hunt. Judging all the way. It is that incessant need and analysis that pisses me off about me. Why can't I be enough for me? What more am I wanting, needing? (When) Will I ever be satisfied?
The questions again.

Jellybutt

These people in front of me look so dry and lifeless, but they'll be the ones who get married, have a steady income, live by standard values and pop out a few plugs of their own and the cycle continues. Where's the spark of awakening; where's life when it all looks like one flat line?

Sometimes (and this sounds so big-headed) I wonder if I am that element in other peoples' lives~if I'm that spark, a piece of magic...

Force

I could be walking down the street, nothing special just carrying shopping, when it will hit me: a memory or thought and that deep missing is there again. I think that when I meet the 'right' person I won't feel it anymore. I also realise that all the strong, almost attacking things I have spoken to others are like a cushion - they make it less real, more cartoon.

This is not happening to me, he wouldn't do this. But he is and it is.